The Hawken Dance Party

There was an extended period during our youth (a period which, arguably, is still alive and well) wherein Jake and I developed a deep appreciation of rap music.

Our love of this urban art form was aided and abetted by our father's love of enormous stereo equipment. Whereas he had carefully built a network of speakers designed to blare Boston songs at decibels capable of knocking small satellites out of orbit, Jake and I tested the limits of Hal's fondest possession on a constant supply of mid-90s hip hop.

Inevitably, while we would be slamming around the living room--the bass so loud it was loosening shingles and fillings--The Beast would wander into the fray.

I am fairly certain that she didn't like the music, but something about the primal roar of bass and drums set her body in motion.

Even the most advanced practitioners of kinesiology cannot explain how (or, for that matter, psychologists cannot explain why) she was moving in such a distinct manner, but it was a sight never to be forgotten.

As with so many other topics relating to the Hawken family, her dances defy mere language.

Perhaps the poet (note: younger readers, please click here instead) captured some of it when he famously wrote,

Now that I told ya a little bit about myself;
Let me tell ya a little bit about this dance.
It's real easy to do--check it out.
First I limp to the side like my leg was broken;
Shakin' and twitchin' kinda like I was smokin'.
Crazy wack funky.
People say ya look like M.C. Hammer on crack, Humpty.
That's all right 'cause my body's in motion.
It's supposed to look like a fit or a convulsion.
Anyone can play this game;
This is my dance, y'all, Humpty Hump's my name.
No two people will do it the same;
Ya got it down when ya appear to be in pain.

As I watched my mother dance, time and again, I began to see her movements as a distinct form of expression: She was imitating someone who was really dancing, who was imitating someone else who was making a joke about another person who was actually dancing.

It ultimately resembled most of the moves found in this piece of documentary footage. I'll let you guess which particular dancers were most successful at mimicking her movements.

Hint: None of the women.